Stopped in Primm around 9:30 to spend the night. The clerk, Malcolm, at the Primm Valley Hotel said there "was no room in the inn". Hmm…that's funny just moments ago I attempted to register online…it said there was plenty of room. I wonder if he could see "tired, Utah girl, no intent to waste money gambling" written anywhere on me. Well I got on my trusty little iPhone and booked us a room within minutes. When the registration was complete, we walked up to the kiosk to check in. WHAT?? SMOKING ROOM? I don't think so. So, once again, Malcolm, graced us with his presence AND once again he said nothing available. Well, just as I was pulling my mother's Italian, "oh, no you don't attitude" from out of my pocket…a room magically became available for us. Good boy Malcolm…you are spared from the wrath of a tired short woman! He supplied us with the map that will lead to comfy splendor for the night and we attempt to make use of it's feeble guidance. As we are hiking to the room with suitcases, laptops and all other precious possessions in hand, I quietly mumble to myself that I hope this hotel does not yet have sophisticated security screening. I am sure we would quickly be turned over to authorities when they reveal that I am smuggling a meatloaf into a hotel!
Ahh…clean nice room, no sign of unwarranted critters, bugs or other sleep preventing measures. Since the trek to the room was quite the unexpected trek, of course a bit of nourishment is necessary. We have more than enough snacks and provisions to feed a small army…or in our case…two traveling women! LOL Now for a quick shower and I calculate that I will be dancing in my dreams within the hour.
Nice hot shower…ahhh…at last the comforts of a nice get-a-way. Well, this shower is a bit different; drips cold water on you just to keep you alert and free from enjoying the relaxing moment too much. Ok…this is a bit much! Where is all this cold water coming from? A quick glance to the ceiling quickly reveals that the upstairs neighbor is about to join me! The ceiling has cold water pouring out of it and could give way at any moment. I do not remember the last time I showered so fast!!!
A quick call soon has a maintenance man at our door. It's now 12:15 am. He says the upstairs must be leaking. Wow, Einstein, now that we know how you got your job…WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO ABOUT IT? Shortly after Mr. Fix-it leaves to go upstairs to awaken the unexpected "flooders" (hahaha, glad I'm on this end of it) we receive a call from the manager and we must be removed from the room at once. Since we are only staying 1 night, they are upgrading us as a courtesy (that's big of you) and we must go back to the front desk and speak with Jim. Oh, yeah…can hardly wait to see what the upgrade is…this time will we get the neighbors already in our bathroom? They have no available staff to help us move to the new room…ah, big shocker there! Once again we load up our crap…and the meatloaf…and board the elevator. Wow…seems like just a short time ago we were in this same vertical moving box. We begin to get the giggles as we realize this will make for quite the "relaxing vacation faux pas" story later. As we reach the ground level and the doors open, Heidi rushes out leaving me behind to pick up items that were hurled to the floor upon her speedy departure. As I bend over to pick them up, the elevator doors close and I am on the move again. Guess I am taking another ride; didn't even know I wanted another ride. On the other side of this surprise, Heidi turns around and sees no sign of me, closed elevator doors and silence…well, besides her outburst of laughter. When I finally navigate my way back to my original departure location, we are both laughing so hard that I am sure we must have awaken every slumbering guest nearby.
Once again we load up the car and find our way back to the front of the hotel and cough our way through the smoke filled casino to the front desk. Malcolm is practicing self-preservation and has made himself scarce, of course. We are greeted by Jim. Ahh, just the man we are seeking...only Jim is not aware that he is to have knowledge of our predicament….nor does he act like he really cares. After explaining the whole story to him…ok, we left out the part of smuggling in a meatloaf and stealing multiple elevators rides….he says he cannot upgrade us to anything better than room 4422. Ok, Jim, bend over here and allow me to smack you…room 4422 IS WHERE WE ARE GOING...not where we are coming from!!!! Please Jim just give me the keys and a reasonable explanation as to where my room is…it's after 1:30am for crying out loud…I WANT MY KEYS, MY ROOM and SLEEEEEEP! Jim has assumed that since we are the only ones in line that we wish to hear all about his life, his ex-wife and all his grand responsibilities here at the casino. Ugh…Jim…you're killing me here dude…just give me my keys and give me directions to this so called upgraded room. Just so long as it has a bed, at this point, I will be just fine…and so will you…if you just hurry even twice as fast as you are now! We finally escaped the front desk with map in hand once again. We decided to drive around the back to see if there was an easier way to our room besides Jims way…which, by the way, was about as clear as mud!
After the LOOOOOONG way around the hotel…oh and the attached factory outlet mall…thanks for that missing tid bit of info JIM….we ended up back at the same parking lot we originally started out in when we were in the leaky room!!! For heaven sakes…will this night ever show me the peaceful slumber that I so long for???
Ok…now to try and find this "upgrade" of a room…can hardly wait to see what Jims version of an upgrade was!
Would someone smack me and wake me up from this nightmare already...elevator does not work at this end of the hotel! Ok…walk the length of a football field to get to the other elevator. Get in and go to the 4th floor…oh goodie the elevator has a window to the casino below. Feel like I'm in a big fish bowl and I have the wet hair to fit the part! Ok…the doors to the elevator open and Heidi attempts to walk out. Now, I imagine the man who invented wheels on the suitcase DID NOT intend for them to be pushed…please tell me I'm right! So as Heidi so bravely attempts to change the invention right there in the elevator…the suitcase wheel gets stuck in the gap between the floor and …well, the elevator floor…and she nearly catapults over her own suitcase. I'm laughing so hard I can barely stand. The more she tugs, the more we laugh at her attempt to pull it loose. Finally, she pulls the poor thing loose. I thought for sure I was going for another elevator ride when the doors began to close…but I escaped just in time ( I have got to write this hotel about the length of time their elevator doors remain open. I am sure, on multiple occasions, housekeeping has found feeble, slow moving elderly people just riding the elevators up and down after hours of attempting to escape it's walls). Now to find the room…bet you'll never guess…yes…back down the "football field" hall again. Jim said only 1/2 way down the hall, but Jim obviously does not know the definition of HALF WAY! Ok…after over shooting the room and turning back…ahhh…room 4422! It does exist!!! As Heidi is opening the door I whisper to her… "With the way things have gone tonight, I sure hope they did not give us an occupied room and we do not walk in on any naked honeymooners!" This of course sends us both giggling again. We locate the light switch and take a deep breath and braced ourselves as to what we would find. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? Ok…give me a leaky ceiling room any day! WE HAVE A SUITE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! We never had it so good…
...the only downside, a pair of pink and purple panties hanging on the back of the bathroom door knob that I did not see until I was in there with the door closed. I was NOT about to touch them or the door knob, so after laughing her butt off, for what seemed an eternity, Heidi finally let me out of the bathroom. Enough of this "FUN"…it's now 2am, I'm tired and want to go to bed!!! Silky feeling sheets…are you kidding me…I have arrived in heaven.
Good night...FINALLY!
5. Use a paintbrush to apply a generous amount of ModPodge to the edge that will be your binding. Be sure to keep the ModPodge on the binding edge ONLY and wipe any excess off of the sides and ends of the book. Apply another binder clip to the center, but leave plenty of room between the clip top and the binding edge. Let dry completely and remove the middle clip.
8. Once you have your cereal box cut, sand down the “picture” side of the box so that it no longer has a shine to it. This will help the ModPodge adhere properly.
11. Next apply ModPodge to the cereal box piece and secure it to your chipboard pages. NOTE…DO NOT add ModPodge to either of the “gutters” of the cereal box piece. These two areas need to move freely and your book will not open properly if these are glued down to your book. Let dry completely.
